Budster's Recipe Page
Welcome to Budster's recipe page. This is only a humble beginning to what I will be posting here as time permits. Please check back often as I will be updating this page often. The recipes listed here are mine, developed over the years, tested on my friends, to the point where I feel confident that they are not only good tasting but fairly simple to make.
I didn't have potatoes,
So I substituted rice.
I didn't have paprika,
So I used another spice.
I didn't have tomato sauce,
So I used tomato paste.
A whole can, not half a can;
I don't believe in waste.
A friend gave me the recipe,
She said you couldn't beat it.
There must be something wrong with her,
I couldn't even eat it!
Are you a cook? Neither am I.
When dinner comes I only sigh,
Wake up the phone and his book
And let somebody be my cook.
A pizza is a trusty meal,
A color frantic tasty wheel.
It disappears in your friends
And lets the party never end.
But cooking is a tempting craft
And gazing down the oven's shaft
I start to wonder if I can
Create a dinner in a pan.
The cooking magic I will work!
No more I'll be a takeout dork!
I'll prove the world what I can be!
I'll make a meal for you and me.
Into the kitchen with brave strides
I walk like wolf, who danger bides.
And looking back to high school days
I recollect my mother's ways.
Spaghetti? Oh, that sounds good!
I grab the package where I stood.
Potatoes I shall add to that.
They'll make it better, so I bet.
My mother always said to add
the veggies, but they make me mad.
To top it off I think I'll put
some oil in (I heard I should)
I say a prayer, turn the knob,
And a blue flame begins to sob.
It's magic, that's why it's so blue.
It makes my tasty dinner stew.
It starts to boil soon enough,
And bubbles make the oil rough.
And lo-'n-behold it starts to burn
Just when it knows my back is turned.
I quickly knew something was wrong
When my stew's smell became too strong.
But no fear, my dear friends,
God blessed me with intelligence.
All fires are quenched by water thrown,
That's one sure thing I've always known.
So thinking quick I pour some in
And see a frightening thing begin.
A fiery face came to my eyes,
It must be Satan in disguise!
It grabbed the stove in fire's grasp!
Behind I heard a frightened gasp.
What happened next I won't describe,
But threaten death, or give a bribe,
Or loose a lion in my den.
But never shall I cook again!!!
by Heather from Barrie, Ontario, Canada
The Chef's Dictionary
Self Serving Chicken
6-7 LB chicken
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing
1 cup uncooked popcorn.
Salt and pepper chicken to taste. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush
chicken well with melted butter, salt and pepper. Fill cavity with
stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan in oven. Listen for popping
sounds; when chicken's ass blows out the oven door and flies across the
room, chicken is done.
Contributed by the Swedish Chef... Here is his classic Chocolate Mooose recipe. It must be read aloud to get the full effect!
Noo, toodie wee well meg dee chocolate mooose.
Step oone, geet a five-pound block oof chocolate. 5 lb. chocolate hefted onto table. THUNK!
Step twoo, get dee mooose. Heer, mooosee mooosee mooosee mooosee! moose walks into kitchen.
Step three, put dee mooose een dee bleender. moose looks quizically as chef puts moose in blender, head first. Vreee! Vreee! Vruuunk!
Nuutice: dee bleender cun't hundel dee entlers. Put dee entlers een last. chef reverses moose, puts back in blender. Moose raises front legs in "why me?" gesture Vreee! Vreee! Vruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunknknknknk Chef pulls antlers out of blender
"Seeve dee entlers, yoo cun use dem fur furks."
Steep three: cuut chocolate eentoo leetle bite-size peeces. Heer, we uuse a cleever. attempts to chop chocolate block with meat cleaver, but only succeeds in breaking the cleaver.
Dees is guud chocolate. Weell, eef at furst yuu dun't succeed, pass dee buck. Get dee asseesteent. Aseesteent! Miss Piggy, in chef's hat and apron, enters kitchen. Asseesteent, pulees cuut dee chocolate eentoo leedle bite-size peeces. Miss Piggy karate-chops chocolate block into little pieces, leaving chocolate all over counter.
Theenk yooo, asseestent. Miss Piggy leaves. Chef uses dustpan and broom to collect chocolate pieces
Steep fuur, put chocolate een weeth mooose, und bleend egen. dumps dumps chocolate into blender, and turns it on. He has forgotten to place the lid on the blender, however, and chocolate moose begins to cover the chef and his kitchen.
Allweeys remembur oone uf twoo theengs. Eether puut dee leed on dee bleender, ur meg shuur det yuur diiners ur een dee keetchen. Collects chocolate moose from his apron using his finger, then tastes it.
Uum! Dees ees guud mooosee
plagerized from Teri.....=^.^=
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